My top 10 Athesit quotes

1. "When I was a child, I used to pray to God for a bicycle. But then I realised that God doesn't work in that way - so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness!" - Emo Phillips

2. "Why should I allow that same God to tell me how to raise my kids, who had to drown His own?" - Robert G. Ingersoll

3. The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one. The happiness of credulity is a cheap and dangerous quality. – George Bernard Shaw

4 . Gods dont kill people. People with Gods kill people. – David Viaene

5. Men rarely (if ever) manage to dream up a God superior to themselves. Most Gods have the manners and morals of a spoiled child. – Robert A Heinlein

6. When one person suffers from a delusion, it is called insanity. When many people suffer from a delusion it is called religion. – Robert Pirsig

7. Man has always required an explanation for all of those things in the world he did not understand. If an explanation was not available, he created one. – Jim Crawford

8. The God of the Old Testament is arguably the most unpleasant character in all fiction: jealous and proud of it; a petty, unjust, unforgiving control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, homophobic, racist, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully. - Richard Dawkins

9. “Since the Bible and the church are obviously mistaken in telling us where we came from, how can we trust them to tell us where we are going?”

Last but not the least.

10. "Aur Tum Apnay Raab ki Kon Kon si Chawaloon ko Chupaoo Gay"

Will the real Islam Please Stand Up

So, will the real Islam please stand up?
And put one of those fingers on each hand up

TV runs in the background …… Bomb blast rocks through a market in Lahore many are feared dead

Me: When will Muslims actually get some respect for life and property?
Muslim: Surely you don’t believe that these are real Muslims?

Me: Real?
Muslims: Islam is a religion of peace and hence and therefore Muslims can’t do this. This is probably the work of some other force.

Me: Yoda?
Muslim: Who? I don’t know ….is he Jewish?

Me: Which other force do you think is doing this?
Muslim: The Jews, the Americans Allah knows.

Me: But the Taliban accepted responsibility for this.
Muslim: Yes they did but maybe it is some fragment of the Taliban that is being funded by the Americans.

Me: let me get this straight. There are mullahs that are getting money from America to bomb Pakistan
Muslim: Yes.

Me: (I want to ask why? but) So we should kill them. If we are the land of the pious Muslims, we should go after these Taliban who are damaging Pakistan no matter who is backing them up. If you hate the Jews and Americas that much you should equally hate their cohorts.
Muslim: uhhh… ?

Me: You said that these guys were running a proxy war on behalf of the Americans to destabilize Pakistan, so we should go after them and kill them
Muslim: Actually these Taliban are misguided Muslims, we should try and reason with them.

Me: Reason with them? How do you do that?
Muslim: talk to them.

Me: But we tried that it failed.
Muslim: yes because government sabotaged it.

Me: ahh ... no it didn’t the Taliban backed out.
Muslim: NO THE GOVERNMENT SABOTAGED IT.

Me: but you have to agree that there is something really wrong with Islam
Muslim: No. Islam is the one true religion

Me: really? How do you explain terrorism, bombs going off and suicide attacks?
Muslim: That’s not real Islam

Me: Subjugation of Women, public lashing?
Muslim: That’s not real Islam

Me: Child marriages?
Muslim: That’s not real Islam.

Me: Blasphemy laws? Let me guess not the real Islam?
Muslim: yeah see you finally see it from our angle.

How many times have you entered into a debate that has ended with this? The problem with Islam is that A would say B is not the real Islam, B would say A is not the real Islam and along would come C who would say neither A nor B are the real Islam. Islam has become this amorphous, fluid, mutilating object, when it comes to debates, whatever aspect you touch you are told that that isn’t it.

The fact is Quran is a very ambiguous to say the least. It contradicts itself a lot. If you talk to the Mullah-apologists regarding this he will say that the wrong kind of muslims …. which means everyone else but him …. misinterpret the verses of the Quran. Some verses are to be taken literally, some are to be taken in context of the verses before and after it, some are to be taken in the context of the situation in which they are revealed, some in the context of the times of the Prophet (marriage to a minor and slavery are explained using this trump card) and yet some have metaphorical meanings and are not to be taken in the literal sense. Here comes the problem, which verse is to be interpreted in which way. Apparently no one knows for sure. Each sect, mullah, militant group, suicide bomber makes up his own mind as how to interpret it. Then there is the hadith, that’s a whole different can of worms that is far more complex in interpretations.

This is the thing that makes Islam amorphous. If the Quran is as complete and as absolute as it is portrayed to be, then why is there room for so much variation? If Allah was all powerful, all knowing, all wise he would have seen the conundrum his words would have caused. Why couldn’t he just say in clear words listen these are the dos and these are the don’ts? Did Allah deliberately cause this confusion, in that case he is a sadistic bastard, or did he not know what this was actually going to cause, not something that would look good on an all powerful creator. Or was it man made and like all religions most of the stuff had to be kept ambiguous enough to allow it to be bent so that the masses can be controlled.

I think Islam needs a proper command and control structure of sorts. Like the Vatican Church, Islam needs a centralized authority that every Muslim adheres to (or two or three for different sects but not more than that). Issues pertaining to incorrect interpretation of Koran can be checked. Just like the Vatican kept some of the rules of traditional Christianity out, this centralized body can keep stuff like jihad, child marriages in check. It would put a leash on Islam and that is precisely what is needed. Get Islam in some solid state.

We need to find something better to do!

Once again, it appears that the Pakistani society has lost its collective shit. The Lahore High Court (LHC), which didn't have anything better to do, after getting done with all the rape, murder and corruption cases, made blasphemy by Facebook et al a top priority and issued an order that the website should be banned. The country’s Internet Big Brother, Pakistan Telecommunication Authority (PTA), which didn't have anything better to do having solved all of the country’s internet and telecommunication infrastructure problems, tested out its new banning website equipment. Extreme religious elements, which NEVER have anything better to do, are celebrating this decision by the court and are pushing that the government break all kind of ties with the countries whose citizens were involved in this "blasphemous" act. It should be mentioned here that some of these extreme religious elements do not recognize the courts in Pakistan and would like to see a Sharia based courts instead. Mainstream media hailed government actions to ban these pages; it seems the media has nothing better to do. All because some 50,000 odd people who had obviously nothing better to do, decided to draw Mohammed. The recent hullaballoo between the extreme right, extreme left, the center left, the center, the center right, the center-right-left, the left-right-center and all the other 32 flavors of Pakistani society, have nothing better to do than debate over this ban (including me).

When I was in grade 5, I used to be a chubby little kid and was teased a lot for it. Whenever anyone called me anything that would in any way alluded to my belly, I would just flare up. I would get angry would huff and puff and eat another sandwich, I obviously had nothing better to do. This continued throughout the whole year, one day was particularly bad, and even my dad noticed that I was down. He asked repeatedly, I didn't tell him, then he took me out and bought me a burger and coke. As diamonds are a girl’s weakness food was mine. I told him, with my mouth filled with fires, burger and ketchup dripping on my shirt, "Kids at school call me fat”, and I fought with one of them. Having an ice-cream after the meal, I told him how it bothered me when people made fun of me. He said, "The more you show a reaction, the more you get agitated the more these people will tease you. They do it primarily to get a reaction out of you, because it is that reaction that they enjoy. If you just ignore them, they would have no reason to call you anything anymore; they will get tired and find something better to do." He was right, grade 6 people continued to tease me, I would just ignore and even at times joke myself about it. Guess what??? ... It all stopped. It stopped. Other kids and I found something better to do. I even became friends with some of them, because they thought I was fun, and even got invited to play football (that is soccer to you Yankees) during recess.

I wish most of the Mullahs in Pakistan and all over the world had gone through grade 5.
My message over here is that if Muslims around the world want to be taken seriously, they need to find something better to do than to fuss over cartoons.
But here is the fact, why would they? The more I study religion the more I am convinced it is the brilliant way rallying the masses for a show of force. One abracadabra and people all of a sudden forget problems like education, healthcare, lawlessness and energy. These mullah who otherwise would have little influence in the Pakistani society have been able to rally a whole mob of Zion Hamid influenced zealots.

Very Persuasive ...

.... wouldn't you agree?

Hey i am back!

Sorry for not being active for a while, I have started a group on facebook called Pakistani, Atheist and Agnostics, please do join up.

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=69368121310